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11.12.12

Keys for a Great 2013

As 2012  comes to a close I find myself pondering on what worked and what didn't so I can learn from my successes and failures for 2013.  There are two things that stand out very strongly.  These two things have also attracted abuse and criticism from some people and praise from others.  I, however, make no apologies for standing by what I believe to be not only be Biblical but also have been proved in my life.  

Tithing
This has been a key to our finances.  My husband and I don't have a fixed income but we do have fixed giving.  We give ten percent of all our income including gift money and all our earnings as a first fruit to God.  In additional to our ten percent we also give offerings of varying amounts as well as money to the poor when we can.

Malachi 3:10-11 says, Bring all the tithes into the storehouse, That there may be food in My house, And try Me now in this,” Says the Lord of hosts, “If I will not open for you the windows of heaven And pour out for you such blessing That there will not be room enough to receive it.  “And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes, So that he will not destroy the fruit of your ground, Nor shall the vine fail to bear fruit for you in the field,” Says the Lord of hosts;

Our family and our church believe wholeheartedly in tithing and we have proven that it works.  The businesses in our church are flourishing as they tithe too.  

Sabbath Rest  
I definitely would not have made it through this year if I didn't believe in this principle.  Our family day is Saturday and we seldom give up our Saturdays for anything.  We love our Saturdays and we rest on our Saturdays.  Each week we all know that we are guaranteed a good rest and some lovely family time which frees us up to work hard and push ourselves for six days.  Having that light at the end of the tunnel each week is wonderful and I would not ever attempt to do life without a good rest each week.  Eric and I also have a weekly date night on Wednesday and this has proven to be a key for or marriage.
   
Exodus 20:11 says, For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it.

What didn't work for me this year was too much time on the computer.  I recognise that although I might look busy, at times the computer simply robs me of my time, so in 2013 I intend to establish some clear computer guidelines so that I have time for other things that I enjoy such as long walks, baking cupcakes with my children and planning my eldest daughters wedding - yikes now that's a biggie.

So how about you, what worked for you this year?  What habits or principles do you intend to keep or put in place next year.

Have a joyful Christmas and a blessed 2013.

Love
Angela
xxx  
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5.12.12

Why We Love Children

A nursery school pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead.
'How do you know that the cat was dead?' she asked her pupil.
'Because I pssed in its ear and it didn't move,' answered the child innocently.
'You did WHAT?' the teacher exclaimed in surprise.
'You know,' explained the boy, 'I leaned over and went 'Pssst' and it didn't move'

A small boy is sent to bed by his father.
Five minutes later.....'Da-ad....'
'What?'
'I'm thirsty. Can you bring a drink of water?'
'No, You had your chance. Lights out.'
Five minutes later: 'Da-aaaad.....'
'WHAT?'
'I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??'
'I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to smack you!!'
Five minutes later......'Daaaa-aaaad.....'
'WHAT!'
'When you come in to smack me, can you bring a drink of water?'

An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief finally asked him 'How do you expect to get into Heaven?'
The boy thought it over and said, 'Well, I'll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!''

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29.11.12

MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway #7

GIVEAWAY:

Today is our last day in the fantastic MASSIVE Christmas giveaway so I thought I would offer you one of my books.  You can choose any book you like from my list of books - to enter simply comment on this post saying which of my books you have most enjoyed reading and which one you would like to read next and then I will send it to you :) You can still enter if you haven't read any of my books but those that have will be entered twice. Other giveaway rules still apply too.



OFFER:

Buy any book from our shop and get a pack of five butterflies. To claim your free butterflies, post a photo of you smiling with your book on our Facebook page and I will send you the butterflies as a thank you.





That concludes our MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway - winners will be announced tomorrow so if you haven't entered yet hurry up!  All 7 giveaway posts can be found here.  Have fun. xxx
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28.11.12

MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway #6

GIVEAWAY:

Lorah Kelly has very kindly offered you a free 45 minute photo session with one free print.  Why not take this opportunity to get some photos done for you family Christmas cards or even get a framed photo to give as a gift.  Lorah studied Art & Design and Cirencester College and is currently Creative Pastor at D7 Church where she heads up all photography, graphics, media, design and D7 Band.   Lorah is a professional wedding, event, and portrait photographer who captures your most treasured memories. Lorah is a trained artist so your photos will have the added bonus of an artistic touch to every shot.  Browse through her website to fully appreciate her work. To enter see the giveaway rules here.

OFFER:


Buy any CD from our shop and get a free print of Lorah-Kelly's well known Architecture Triptych. To claim your free artwork, post a photo of you smiling with your CD on our Facebook page and I will send you the artwork as a thank you.







If you have something you would like to contribute to our Massive Christmas Giveaway please let me know.  Giveaway #7 coming soon so keep a look out.
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27.11.12

MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway #5

GIVEAWAY:

Karin Whittaker of Karosa Jewellery, designer of hand-crafted silver jewellery, has offered us two stunning sets of earrings to giveaway.  You have a choice of these beautiful pearl drops or silver hearts. Karin is based in the stunning Forest of Dean in Gloucestershire - England’s largest oak forest. She works with silver using techniques such as reticulation, hammering, forging and etching. The silver is sourced through a UK bullion recycling company and is recycled 925 sterling silver. The pearls used by Karin are traded ethically by a charity based in the Philippines, which supports local communities there. Find out more about Karosa Jewellery here.
To enter see the giveaway rules here.

OFFER:

Buy any book from our shop and get a free print of Lorah-Kelly's well known original drawing - A Naked Man. To claim your free artwork, post a photo of you smiling with your book on our Facebook page and I will send you the artwork as a thank you.







If you have something you would like to contribute to our Massive Christmas Giveaway please let me know.  Giveaway #6 coming soon so keep a look out.
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26.11.12

MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway #4

GIVEAWAY:

Our lovely local Forever consultant, Dawn Swinley, has offered a fantastic goodie bag for our giveaway.  It contains an Aloe shield, a moisturising lotion, a lip balm and a £5 gift voucher.  Dawn is a northern lass living in Gloucester with her beauiful family, Casper and twin teenagers Matt and Laura and not forgetting their black lab Mckenzie, 2 guinea pigs and now the fish! She started her business over four years ago as she wanted to be a stay at home mum but also wanted an extra income, Forever just fitted the bill. Dawn loves the products and loves the benefits of them. She said, "I truly believe that what you use on a daily basis is paramount in maintaining healthy skin, hair, nails and more importantly staying healthy from the inside out, yes you drink it aswell."  Find out more about Forever here.   To enter see the giveaway rules here.

OFFER:

Buy an In the Stillness CD by D7  Band and get an In the Stillness Songbook PDF for free.  To claim your free songbook post a photo of you smiling with your In the Stillness CD on our Facebook page and I will send you the songbook as a thank you.







If you have something you would like to contribute to our Massive Christmas Giveaway please let me know.  Giveaway #5 coming soon so keep a look out.
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24.11.12

MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway #2

GIVEAWAY:

Christine Caine has very kindly given us two signed copies of  her latest book, Undaunted - Daring to do what God calls you to do.  I haven't read this book yet and am looking forward getting my own copy too as Christine is always so inspiring.  Today it's your turn to get a copy of her book. To enter see the giveaway rules here and in the meantime check out her anti-trafficking campaign - the A21 Campaign.



OFFER:

Buy a King's Daughters T-Shirt and get a Little Book of Prayer for free.  To claim your free book post a photo of you smiling and wearing your T-Shirt on our Facebook page and I will send you the book as a thank you.


If you have something you would like to contribute to our Massive Christmas Giveaway please let me know.  Giveaway #3 coming soon so keep a look out.
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20.11.12

MASSIVE Christmas Giveaway #1

GIVEAWAY:
 
 
Daughters of Davis have very kindly given us three copies of  their debut album, To The Water.  I already have my own copy of this CD and I can't stop listening to it, it is stunning. DoD are currently on their UK tour taking to the road for the year ahead having already spent the last 15 months at it.  Today it's your turn to get a copy of their album. To enter see the giveaway rules here and in the meantime check out their YouTube chanel.


OFFER:

Buy one of my books and get a King's Square CD by D7 Band for free.  To claim your free CD post photo of you smiling with the book your purchased on our Facebook page and I will send you a CD as a thank you.







If you have something you would like to contribute to our Massive Christmas Giveaway please let me know.  Giveaway #2 coming soon so keep a look out.
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18.11.12

OUR BATTLE... is not against flesh and blood


Today I spoke at our church about reality.  We looked at the hard truth of John 16:33 - In this world you will have trouble and we unpacked Ephesians 6:12 - For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 

Have a listen to the MP3 here or watch the video below.

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9.11.12

Being a Woman in Business - Who Respects Men

The way you treat a man at work will hugely affect how well he will perform.  That is the bottom line.  If you want to get the most out of the men you either lead or work for you need to learn to treat them with respect.  Respect is a huge key to a better work life.  A man needs to know that he is enough and a man needs be respect.  These needs are so important that without them a man will be crippled.  If you can understand how to work with men then you will have more success than women who don’t understand a man’s needs.
     The Bible clearly states the needs of men and women in a marriage setting.  Ephesians 5:33 says, “Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”  Respect is their fundamental need and they need it both at home and in the work place. 
     When respect is absent a man will naturally show harshness and hostility in varying degrees.  Disrespecting a man emasculates him and you will not get the desired result as a woman in business if you go around emasculating men.  Respect powerfully motivates a man.  If you want to motivate the men in your workplace or a male client then show them respect on a regular basis. 

How to Show Respect:
It’s one thing to say that you should respect a man but for many women this simply doesn’t come naturally.  You will need to work at this.  Here are some practical tips for how you can show respect to the men in your world. 

Respect His Abilities
A woman who constantly second guesses a man is annoying to the man.  We, as woman, tend to always try to fix men and we even try and do this in the work place.  If you want a good working relationship with men give them credit where credit is due.  Boost their ego.  Mention how impressed you are with their abilities.  Say things that give them a lift and show respect for their abilities.  Even if you can do it ten times better, just show them respect for what they are able to do.
    Men need to be left to figure things out for themselves.  Once they have succeeded they will enjoy a great sense of accomplishment and will feel that they have conquered.  Men need to be ‘it’ much more than women, who need to be liked. 

Respect His Position
If you have male superiors then it is essential to show them respect for their position.  You don’t need to respect their character or their bad behaviour if they are up to no good, but you do need to respect their authority over you. 

Respect in Public
It appears to have become fashionable and funny to disrespect men in public.  Women laugh and make fun of men in front of their work colleagues, TV and movies make this sort of thing look funny but actually it deeply wounds the men.  Make every effort to show respect to men in public.   

Respect Sincerely
Cultivate a lifestyle of sincere respect for men.  Honour them and show them respect even behind their back.  Don’t become two-faced just so you can get what you want from them.  That is not at all what we are aiming for.  Some men are real jerks and you might think they don’t deserve respect, especially when they treat you poorly.  In these cases don’t respect what they do but intentionally respect what is good in them.  Soon enough they will become the person that you have respected and the silly jerkishness will fall away.

Women do not naturally respect men that we are familiar with.  Usually, we respect the man we meet at first but as soon as familiarity creeps in we lose that respect.  It is at this point that we need to continue showing respect for him out of our own free will.  In fact, it is in our sinful nature to disrespect men and to think we know better in most cases but you should not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement.  
    I am fully expecting an uproar about this section but may I ask that before you get upset please observe yourself.  Take time to see how you truly feel about the men your work with and observe how you treat them.  More often than not I suspect you will find that deep down inside you do not respect them and it is likely that you are not communicating respect to them.  Don’t be upset with me, judge yourself soberly and if it’s not true for you then well done and if it is then made the necessary changes. 

Find out more about Being a Woman in Business here or use this material to host your own Girl's Night.  We also have a monthly business networking event called Women in Business, find our more here
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5.11.12

Being a Mother - Who Loves

Above all things I believe in love. Love is like oxygen. Love is a many-splendored thing. Love lifts us up where we belong. All you need is love!  -  Christian, Moulin Rouge (2001)

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
-  The Bible, Romans 5:8

We often speak of the need to love our spouse, to love our neighbours and to love God.  Love is the subject or many songs, movies and advertising billboards.  Love truly is all around us and God Himself is love.  When we speak of loving our children most of us will have warm fuzzy feelings and think of all the lovely kisses and cuddles that we share with our precious children.  Warm fuzzy feelings are good and a necessary part of life but love is so much more than that. 

In Titus 2:4-5 the older women were instructed to teach the young women to love their husbands and to love their children.  The Greek word philoteknos is used in the original Bible text in this verse and refers to mothers loving their children.  It is specifically maternal love.  Motherly love is a special sort of love that God has given us women to enable us to take good care of our children. 
    The fact that the older women were told to teach the younger women to love their children means that there are things to be learned too.  Love is so much more than a feeling and most certainly much more than a cuddle.  I hope that together we can learn how to love our children in a way that is pleasing to God.
    True love is clearly defined in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.  This is the standard for loving anyone, including your children.  Have a read through the list of love attributes and measure yourself against them.  Do you truly love your children?

Love is patient
Love is kind
Love is not envious
Love is not boastful
Love is not proud
Love is not rude
Love is not selfish
Love is not provoked
Love keeps no record of wrongs
Love thinks no evil
Love does not rejoice in iniquity
Love rejoices in the truth
Love bears all things
Love believes all things
Love hopes all things
Love endures all things.
Love never fails    

I fall short and I am sure you do too.  Loving is not a warm fuzzy feeling but hard work.  Loving pays a price to love.  Loving takes commitment and dedication.  If we can do our best to truly love our children then they in turn will learn how to give love to others.  We all fall short, only God is capable of loving perfectly, not missing one thing on the list ever, not even for one minute of a day. 
    We cannot love so perfectly but that doesn’t mean we can’t try.  When last did you try and be patient with your child or not assume the worst of them.  Were you provoked by your rude teenager or rude to your nine year old who is getting cheeky?  Yes of course children push us to our limits and I know how difficult loving an unkind teenager can be but we don’t do it for them.  We do it to please God.  Whenever I know I have failed in loving my children the first thing I do is apologise to God because I know that they are very precious to Him.  The second thing I do is apologise to my children and tell them that I was wrong and that they don’t deserve to be treated that way.  
     You see, as parents we reflect the love of God to our children.  They will learn what love is through us.  They will learn how to treat others lovingly by imitating us.  Their ability to give and receive love will stem from how we loved them.    
    I am often ashamed when I see my children be rude or impatient or unkind.  It is clear where they got it from.  More often than not it is from my bad example.  Even though I try my best to be loving, patient, kind and all the things on the list, they will imitate the one time I got it wrong!  I know I need help.  I know that this sort of love is divine and so I ask God for His love to be inside of me so that when I love I can access His prefect love which is everything on the list all of the time.   Like you, I want to love my children as best I can and teach younger mothers how to love their children too.  If that is the only thing we work on as a mother that’s alright because love never fails.

Find out more about Being a Mother here or use this material to host your own Girl's Night or Mum's Group.
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2.11.12

Nature's Way - Oils

Baby oil, along with other common household oils for massage, hair, and bath, essential oils, eucalyptus and camphor oils, are responsible for at least 3000 reported ingestion accidents to young children every year in Australia.
    Toxicologist Dr Naren Gunja from NSW Poisons Information Centre at Westmead Hospital says most parents don't realise the danger.  "Once the child has ingested it depending on how much they ingest then it could be too late. Over a period of time, the child can die," says Dr Gunja. "It is a gradual process that can take several days, two weeks to die."

Mineral Oils
White oil, mineral oil and more commonly known as baby oil when we buy it for our little ones, is a petroleum by-product.  I don’t know about you but I don’t feel so good about rubbing anything from petrol all over my body.  This oil is used on its own or as a base for many other cosmetic products.  It has been shown to increase the risk of cancer and is also know to trigger asthma. 
     This mineral oil coats the skin like clingfilm which inhibits its ability to breathe and absorb moisture or nutrition.  Even though you might use oil to keep our skin from drying out you will find over a period of time that it actually causes dryness and irritation and will compound the very problems you were trying to fix.   When using these oils you will disrupt the skin's natural immune barrier as well as its ability to release toxins.  The result is blocked pores which can lead to spots or acne and other skin disorders.   It will also slow down the skins normal functions and cell development which will cause your skin to age prematurely. 

Plant Oils
Plant oils that we use in our kitchen on our body are either heat extracted oils, expeller pressed or cold pressed oils.  You would think that because it is a plant based oil that it will be safer for you than mineral oils.  Sadly, even these oils can be dangers so you need to choose wisely before eating or applying these oils to your body.  There are three methods of extracting vegetable oils from nuts, grains, beans, seeds or olives: heat extracted oils, expeller pressed oils and cold pressed oils.  Cold pressed oils are the most natural oils to use.  You will usually find the cold pressed oils much more expensive than heat extracted or expeller pressed oils so if you are not sure the price will definitely be a giveaway.
   
Heat Extracted Oils
Extracting oil with this method is done by heating up the raw materials and possibly even adding chemicals to help extract more oil.  Heat pressing increases the yielded quantity of oil which is why cold pressed oils are more expensive than heat pressed oils.
    The introduction of heat and chemicals to the process of making oil degrades their flavour, nutritional value and colour.  Oils are composed of long-chain fatty acids and these are damaged by heat extraction method.  Little pieces break off the long-chain fatty acid when heated and are toxic to the body. 
    A solvent is often added to assist with the extraction.  Usually a petroleum by-product like Hexane, Pentane, Heptane is used and then removed again afterwards by distillation.

Expeller Pressed Oils
Expeller pressing is a mechanical method for extracting oil from raw materials.  This uses a screw or continuous press with a constantly rotating worm shaft where raw material goes in one end and is put under continuous pressure and discharged at the other end, producing oil.  It is during this process that temperatures can rise up to 250 °C as a result of friction.  Expeller pressed oil is similar to cold pressed oil in that neither process involves the use of any chemicals.  The difference between expeller pressing and the cold press method is heat.  Both methods use presses but cold pressed is done in a temperature-controlled setting.

Cold Pressed Oils
Cold pressing is an ancient method and yields the best quality oil. The only two materials that will yield enough oil without requiring heat are sesame seeds and olives.  These oils are the most natural form of oil have great colour, odour and flavour.  If oil has been extracted by hydraulic press but has been heated prior to pressing, he will refer to it as pressed, not cold pressed so read your labels carefully.  When choosing oil you need extra virgin cold pressed oil.  Unrefined is always best as well as undistilled.    

Nature’s Way Oils
Extra virgin cold pressed oils are the only oils that you should be consuming or using on your body.   

Choosing Your Oil 
  • Light - Olive oil can become rancid from exposure to light and heat, so choose an olive oil that comes in a dark tinted glass bottle.
  • Temperature – Buy olive oil that has been kept in cool area, away from any direct or indirect contact with heat.  Cold pressed extra virgin olive oil is always best.
  • Acidity – Extra virgin olive oil can contain up to 0.8% of free acidity.  Any more than that is not extra virgin.
  • Purity – This term can be misleading.  You do not want pure olive oil, this means that is a mixture of olive oils or has been purified by one of many methods that strips the oil of it nutrients.  Cloudy olive oil is a good sign not a bad sign.

Sadly, to see the words "extra virgin olive oil" on the label of a bottle does not guarantee that you are getting extra virgin olive oil.  You really need to know what you are looking for, the oil you are looking for is not commonly found and is not cheap. 

Find out more about Nature's Way here.
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29.10.12

Anointed for Business

I passionately believe that we have missed the whole point of the gifts of the spirit, the fivefold ministry and the church.  It seems we have built a church based on our needs and our comfort rather than on the needs of the lost and dying world around us.  It is time for the church to rise up and get out into the world again.  Recently I have had the privilege of speaking at our church about a subject.  I spoke about how we are actually anointed for business and how we need to take the church out into the business world and stop keeping the power of God hidden away in the churches.  This message is new and I hope to develop it more and tidy it up so I can share it with other churches and groups of people but for now, here is the first draft of Anointed for Business Part I and II.   I hope God speaks to you through this message and if you would like me to share it at your church please feel free to make a booking here.

Anointed for Business I



Anointed for Business II

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25.10.12

Being a Lover

























Being a Lover is a part of the Being series where we look at the honest and practical truth about sex. God made sex for pleasure yet many women struggle to be truly free in this area. A must read for women with great benefits for men too.

You are very welcome to join us at our Girl's Nights or even start your - we will provide you with study notes.  More info Girl's Nights and how to start your own Girl's Night, here.


Contents
Invitation   
Heterosexual and Married   
The Five Stages of Sex   

Being a Lover   
    For the First Time   
    With a Past   
    Who Plans   
    Who Understands   
    Who Helps   
    Who has Fun   
    In Her Mind   
    Who Communicates   
    Who Does Not Grow Cold   
    Who Seduces   
    Who Expresses Her Feelings   
    Who is Naked   
    Who is Unashamed   
    Who is Healthy   
    Who is Pregnant   
    Who is Ageing   



Purchase Options
Which chapter would you like?

Study Notes:
For small group study, printable PDF notes and worksheets are available for each chapter at £1.20 per chapter.  Once you have purchased the PDF's you are welcome to print off as many copies as you need.  These notes offer thought provoking conversation guides that will guarantee a lively women's study group.


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22.10.12

Abundant Life Workbook

























Abundant Life Workbook
Practical Steps for Living Life to the Full

Why does the Bible say that we can have life abundantly and yet so many people are still struggling? Why does the Bible say that we don’t have to worry about money and yet most people still worry? How do we live the life that it Jesus wants us to live in this day and age? ABUNDANT LIFE highlights the valuable and timeless principles that lead to a life more abundantly.  Take control of your life one step at a time until you find yourself living an abundant life with the very practical Abundant Life Workbook.

Workbook available: Amazon.com | Amazon.co.uk | Fishpond | Kindle
Best results when used alongside the Abundant Life book.

Contents:
Step 1 - Small Steps   
Step 2 – Your Will   
Step 3 – Your Mind   
Step 4 – Joyful Trials   
Step 5 – Emergency Exits
Step 6 – Daily Discipline
Step 7 – God’s Way   
Step 8 – Being You   
Step 9 – Finding You   
Step 10 – Circumstance Stepping-Stone   
Step 11 – Circumstance Creativity   
Step 12 – Circumstance Gratitude   
Step 13 – Back to Love   
Step 14 – Love Languages
Step 15 – Iron Sharpening
Step 16 – Eliminating Busyness   
Step 17 – Resting   
Step 18 – Fasting   
Step 19 – Stewarding   
Step 20 – Producing Fruit
Step 21 – Vision   
Step 22 – PAD
Step 23 – Gifts 
Step 24 – Going Back
Step 25 – Moving Forward
Step 26 – Death


Study Notes:
The study notes contain the same material as the workbook but for your convenience we have created printable PDF notes and worksheets for small group study.  Once you have purchased the PDF's you are welcome to print off as many copies as you need.

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Abundant Life - Abundant Relationships

Do to others as you would have them do to you - Luke 6:31

    When it comes to relationships there is a very simple rule to follow that will bring abundance into every single relationship in your life and that is simply to do to others as you would have them do to you. It is quite that simple and if you could develop that one habit then I am convinced that every single one of your dealings with another human being would flourish.  If we all simply took a minute to consider out actions or words before unleashing them, to think about if they were something that we would like done to us, then the world might be a very different place. 
    Another hugely important key to any relationship is love.  It may sound a bit weird to you if I told you to love your boss at work but you mind think it is perfectly reasonable if I told you to love your husband.  True love works no matter what.
At the heart of every single relationship on the earth is the need for love.  Your boss will flatly deny it and so might your teenager but your husband might agree.   The simple truth is that it is possible that you have misunderstood what love is which is why you might thing what I am saying is bizarre. 

Love is Not a Feeling
Let’s start with the basics.  Love is not a feeling.  Love is an act of your will.  If your idea of love is the squishy feeling you get inside of you then we are talking about two different things.  The squishy feeling is in fact infatuation not love.  Infatuation can be defined as a feeling of foolish or extravagant passion or attraction.  Most people say that they fall in love, which sadly means that you can fall out of love again.  What they actually mean is that they were infatuated at first but then the passion faded. True love does not depend on fleeting, passionate feelings.  True love cannot be fallen into or fallen out of.  True love is a decision that you make to love someone and the only way you can stop loving them is if you decide to stop loving them.  True love does not depend on how you feel about them, it is a decision you make that is unrelated to how you feel on any given day or where you are in your hormonal cycle if you are a woman.  You see, relationships based on infatuation are unstable and unpredictable.
     A relationship based on love is secure and will withstand the storms of life.  Sadly, we human beings are incapable of pure love; we are too selfish and hopelessly flawed.  Even our best attempts at truly loving someone will always be tainted by our flaws and there can never be pure.  Thank God for Jesus!  He was the only human being who ever lived whose love was perfect on this earth.  His love is and always will be pure and available to us.  It is when we tap into His love that we are truly able to love, and it’s in His love where all abundant relationships begin. 

Let’s Start at the Very Beginning
You cannot give what you don’t have to give.  If you do not have the love of Jesus inside your heart then you are unable to give His pure love to another living person.  You need to start at the very beginning. 

 We love Him because He first loved us.                  - 1 John 4:19

The very beginning is realising that it all starts with God.  If you already love God you cannot take any credit for loving Him.  You love Him because He first loved you.  If you don’t love God then may I tell you a little bit about Him please?
     God loves you.  Yes, the creator of the universe loves YOU.  He is besotted with you.  He has watched you for every minute of your life since you were born.  In fact, He knew you and all the plans He had for you long before you were even thought of by your parents.  He said in the Bible that before He formed you in the womb He knew you .  God loves you so much that He even sent His one and only son, Jesus, to save you.  As you might already know, this trip from heaven to earth ended up resulting in Jesus death for you.  He died so that you could live.  He was punished so that you didn’t have to be.  He took your guilt and shame so that you could be free.  He did all these things before you even knew that He existed.  Now that is true love.

This is a chapter snippet from the book, Abundant Life.  Find out more here or use the Abundant Life study notes or workbook for self study or for group study.  Abundant Life is guaranteed to change your life so that you can live life to the full - more abundantly.
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18.10.12

Esther or Delilah? - Delilah’s Story

Sampson was an incredibly strong man, his strength was a gift from God which came with a very specific instruction. From the day he was born until the day he died, God said that he was not to cut his hair.  Samson’s mother did as God said and did not cut his hair.  Samson enjoyed great strength all through his childhood and teens, having never cut his hair.  However, Samson grew up and along with his mighty strength, he also developed a weakness.  Like most men, he liked beautiful women!  After all, who can resist a beautiful woman? 
The love of Samson’s life was a beautiful woman, Delilah.  Sadly, this beautiful woman, like many beautiful women today, was not good for him.  Delilah was being paid by the Philistines to seduce Samson in order to find out what made him so very strong.  The Philistines said to her, “Entice him, and find out where his great strength lies, and by what means we may overpower him, that we may bind him to afflict him; and every one of us will give you eleven hundred pieces of silver.” 
So Delilah, using all of her charm and beauty, said to Samson, “Please tell me what makes you strong.  I really, really want to know. Tell me too what would cause you to lose your strength.”
    Delilah batted her eye lids, pouted her lips and used her voluptuous body to seduce Samson into telling her what she needed to know.  As she sat giving him her sexiest smile he said to her, “If you tie me up with seven fresh bowstrings, not yet dried, then I will become weak, and have the usual strength like any other man.”
    Delilah left Samson while he was having a nap and raced off to tell the leaders of the Philistines what she had discovered.  Immediately they set to work and got seven fresh bowstrings, not yet dried, gave them to Delilah and she tied him up with them.  Some of the Philistine men came into the room with her, ready to capture Samson when they were sure he was weakened.  She said to him, “The Philistines are upon you, Samson!”
But he broke the bowstrings as a strand of yarn breaks when it touches fire. So the secret of his strength was not known.
    Samson seemed oblivious to what Delilah was up to and so this game continued as she asked him where he got his strength from and he responded with something that was not true.  When Samson fell asleep Delilah would try what Samson had told her, the Philistines would come to get him and he would escape.
Delilah became upset and said to Samson, “How can you say, ‘I love you,’ when your heart is not with me? You have mocked me these three times, and have not told me where your great strength lies.”
    She continued to use the ‘if you love me’ line on Samson day in and day out.  Pestering him daily with her words, she wore him down until he could take it no more.  She nagged and nagged and nagged.  Samson’s soul became vexed to death and he gave in to her.   He told her everything about himself and said to her, “No razor has ever come upon my head, for I have been a Nazirite to God from my mother’s womb. If I am shaven, then my strength will leave me, and I shall become weak, and be like any other man.”     
Once again, Delilah lulled him to sleep on her knees.  As soon as he had drifted off she called over a man and had him shave off the seven locks of his head.  Delilah immediately began to shout and call out to Samson so that he would wake up and as he woke his strength left him.   She continued to taunt him saying, “The Philistines are upon you, Samson!”
    Samson, being accustomed to Delilah’s games, awoke from his sleep and thought that he could shake the Philistines off as before but he could not.  Not this time!  God had left.  God was not with him anymore and when God left so did Samson’s great strength. 
Shock, horror and utter disbelief filled Samson when he realised what had happened.  Before he even had time to collect his thoughts excruciating pain writhed throughout his entire body as they gauged out his eyes.  Blood mixed with sweat dripped down his face but no mercy was given as they forced him to walk down to Gaze.  He was bound with bronze fetters by the Philistines and taken captive.  Within a few short hours, Samson had gone from being the world’s strongest man to a mere prisoner slave.  As he ground  away each day in the prison mill, he recalled how he once had it all.  He had the looks, the life and the girl.  Most importantly, he had God with him.
    Samson lived in utter humiliation as a slave and a prisoner. The shackles were holding his body but regret and guilt had taken control of his soul.   This once mighty man was reduced to nothing – the joke of the Philistines.  He gave up his strength for a beautiful woman but ended up losing both his strength and the woman he loved.   His life was wasted and he had nothing to live for. 
    One evening, while Samson sat bound with his chains of regret as well as chains of steel, the Philistines called upon Samson to perform for them.  Their hearts were particularly merry that evening and they must have thought it fun to watch this prisoner perform for them. 
Samson was brought down from the prison and placed between two pillars.  Of course, having no eyes made him feel insecure and so he said to the lad who held him by the hand, “Let me feel the pillars which support the temple, so that I can lean on them.”
    Now the temple was full of men and women. All the lords of the Philistines were there—about three thousand men and women on the roof watching while Samson performed.  Then Samson called to the LORD, saying, “O Lord GOD, remember me, I pray! Strengthen me, I pray, just this once, O God, that I may with one blow take vengeance on the Philistines for my two eyes!”
    And Samson took hold of the two middle pillars which supported the temple, and he braced himself against them, one on his right and the other on his left.  Then Samson said, “Let me die with the Philistines!”
    And he pushed with all his might, and the temple fell on the lords and all the people who were in it. So the dead that he killed at his death were more than he had killed in his life.
 
This is a chapter snippet from Esther or Delilah?  
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16.10.12

King's Daughters Team Vacancies

Hello lovely King's Daughters,

We are busy putting our thinking caps on for 2013 and have discovered that there is more to do than we can possibly manage alone.  So it is with great excitement that I want to let you know about the vacancies on the King's Daughters Team.

We are looking for people to run the following departments:
  • Causes
  • Events
  • Network
  • Prayer
  • Worldwide
Each one of these areas is in its infant stages except for events which is already quite a busy department.  We are looking for lovely ladies who might be interested in either leading or supporting any of the above areas.  If you are interested, would like to get involved and live a reasonable distance from Cheltenham, UK please get in touch.  Involvement is voluntary at this stage and required a minimum of one meeting per month and of course activity in your department.  Only women who can agree to our statement of faith will be considered. 

2013 is going to be our best year yet!  I can't wait to get stuck into it with you.

Love
Angela
xxx
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13.10.12

Nature's Way - Exfoliator

Exfoliation is a good practise for removing the top layer of the skin, which consists mainly of dead skin cells, oil, sweat and dirt. As this layer builds up it dulls your skins appearance. Once this layer is removed your skin will appear healthier and have a lovely natural glow to it.
     Exfoliating has been around for quite some time, the Ancient Greeks exfoliated by rubbing their skin with a mixture of oils and sand.  They then scraped their skin with a strigil,  which is a curved metal scraper used to scrape dirt and sweat from the body before effective soaps became available.   
      We have moved on from that method but many modern methods can be harmful and even dangerous.  Abrasive methods have long been hailed as the cure for wrinkles, acne and other skin conditions but these harsh methods actually remove your skins natural defences.  The result is not wrinkle free, acne free skin but rather damaged skin.   Some exfoliators are so harsh that they can cause the face to bleed, especially ones that include sharp objects such as apricot kernels and walnut shells.  These can be used for feet and elbows but definitely not for your face.  Acclaimed facialists Sarah Chapman Chapman and Vaishaly Patel suggest you avoid the new breed of home microdermabrasion kits which sandblast the skin with aluminium oxide crystals.  They say that these sorts of things are simply too harsh and aggressive.  
      A good rule of thumb is to use exfoliates that are rounded such as sand, bicarbonate of soda, sugar, salt, etc.  If you live near the seaside I highly recommend spending some time gently rubbing the sea sand all over your body – the combination of salt and sand does wonders for your skin.
      Men who shave with blade razors as opposed to electric ones don’t need to exfoliate; the razor does the job quite nicely.

Nature’s Way Alternatives
Ground oats is my favourite exfoliator as I always have plenty of it in my home and it does the job perfectly. Because oats are mildly rough, they are one of nature's most effective exfoliators. They soften the skin leaving it silky smooth and have been clinically shown to help heal dry, itchy skin. 
 
Results:
  • Healthier skin
  • Slows the ageing process
  • Save lots of money
  • No harmful chemicals

Cautions:
  • Don’t exfoliate more than once a week – it’s not necessary and can dry out or damage your skin which needs time to restore its natural oil balance.
  • Don’t rub too harshly or excessively.
  • Avoid the delicate skin around your eyes.
  • Don’t exfoliate in the morning - exfoliating your face can increase sun sensitivity by up to 45% as it removes the natural oils produced while you sleep which can act as a natural mild sun protection.
  • Don’t use harsh exfoliators such as apricot kernel and walnut shells.
  • Don’t use chemical exfoliators or chemical peels as they will damage your skin.

NATURE’S WAY EXFOLIATOR

Ingredients:  Oats

Method:  Take 2 - 3 teaspoons raw oats and crush them into smaller bits either by hand or in a grinder. After cleansing your face gently rub the oats into your skin for 10 to 15 seconds. Rinse your face with warm water until you no longer feel the granules of the oats. Dry your face gently with a clean soft towel and if necessary follow with a natural toner and moisturiser.

More exfoliator recipes:
There are many other simple ways to make exfoliators using natural ingredients, here are some examples:

Yogurt and Rice Powder
If you have oily skin, you can use yogurt to exfoliate as it will remove blackheads and whiteheads. 
  • Mix rice powder and yogurt together into a thick paste.
    Rub it into your skin in little circular movements.  
  • Leave for five minutes and rinse it off.

Olive Oil and SugarIf you have oily skin, you can use yogurt to exfoliate as it will remove blackheads and whiteheads. 
  • 3 tablespoons of Extra Virgin Olive Oil
  • ½ cup of Granulated Sugar
  • 2 tablespoons Aloe Vera (optional)

Mix all the ingredients together and rub it into your skin in little circular movements.   This is suitable for face and body exfoliation.  Leave for three to five minutes and rinse it off.  The sugar will remove dead skin cells and the olive oil and Aloe Vera will nourish your skin keeping it moisturized.

Milk and Salt
  • ½ cup cold milk 
  • ½ tablespoon salt

Soak a cotton ball and gently dab all over your face.  Allow the mixture to dry on your face for about 3 minutes and then dip the cotton ball in the mixture again and rub lightly in a circular motion.  Rinse with warm water. The milk will remove deep pore dirt and the salt will exfoliate.

Now it's your turn.
If you have any exfoliating tips that work well, please share them with us.  Find out more about Nature's Way here.
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8.10.12

Being a Woman in Business - Who Has a Vision

Sometime around 600 BC the wisest king to rule Israel, King Solomon, wrote, “Where there is no vision, the people perish.”  Not much has changed since then and this timeless principle can be applied to many areas of life including our business life. 
    Vision in this Proverb is from the Hebrew word châzôn which means mental sight, a dream, revelation or oracle and stems from the primitive root châzâh which means to gaze at, to mentally to perceive, contemplate (with pleasure); specifically to have a vision of, behold, look, prophesy and see.  So as you can see having a vision has a lot to do with being able to see ahead. 
    For many years people have tried to gain the ability to predict things, especially in the area of business.  We have everything from fortune tellers and weather forecast to cash flow forecasts and economists.  Having a vision however is not gaining the ability to tell the future but it is about having the ability to see what the future could be like.  Once you can see where you are going you are better able to plot your course to getting there.  Too often in business we are like a dog chasing its tail.  You can get so caught up being incredibly busy running around that you don’t even realise that going nowhere.     
    Success in business starts with a vision, with a dream.  Too many people lose the dream because they are drowned by the workload.  No matter where you are in your business right now, stop for a moment.  Stop to take time to remember the dream that you had before starting your business.  Stop for a moment and write down what you are aiming for.  You are more likely to hit the bull’s eye if you actually aim for it. 
    In the mid to late 7th century BC, another great man, Habakkuk, recorded what God said to Him about vision.  God said, “Write the vision and make it plain on tablets, that he may run who reads it.”   So here we find the second key to vision and that is to write it down.  When we write down our vision we are free to run because we know here we are heading.  Things are clearer and we are able to get on with them.  When we don’t write down our vision we could end up anywhere.  Writing the vision down helps you to clarify the vision, to make it plain.        
     Once your vision is written you are better able to define a clear path towards it. 
In engineering or software development a process called reverse engineering is often adopted.  Reverse engineering is simply taking things apart and putting them back together again in order to understand them, copy them or improve them.  In the same way, we can take our vision and break it down as much as possible until we better understand it, then we can plan a clear path to achieve it.  Start with the end in mind. Many people fail to achieve what they set out to do because they are unable to break the huge vision down into small steps so they give up unsuccessful and frustrated.   
     Finally, you need to live the vision.  Each small step, each day and each piece of the plan no matter how small is all living the vision.  You are now on the journey towards your vision.  It’s a very exciting journey and if you are focused and intentional in every step you will live your dream.  Most importantly, you will discover that the journey is the dream and not necessarily the destination.  You learn and grow and become the person you need to be as you reach towards you vision.  It’s a wonderful process and if you can learn to enjoy the journey and live the vision each day then you will be a lot less stressed than people who see attaining the vision as the only source of fulfilment.  Enjoy the journey.
    It is very likely that you will hit a wall on your journey.  You will reach a place where it doesn’t seem to be working and you will be tempted to give up and either accept failure or find a new vision.  More often than not, giving up occurs right before a breakthrough.   Too many people give up too soon and miss the breakthrough that was just around the corner.  If you really believe in what you are doing don’t give up.  Push yourself through hard time, enjoy the good times and understand that the journey will always have its ups and downs.

So in summary here is your vision plan:

1.    Have a Vision
2.    Write the Vision
3.    Reverse Engineer the Vision
4.    Live the Vision
5.    Don’t Give Up
Find out more about Being a Woman in Business here or use this material to host your own Girl's Night.  We also have a monthly business networking event called Women in Business, find our more here.  
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1.10.12

The 5 Stages of Being a Mother

Baby and Toddler
Having a baby can be very different for many people.  Some find it easy and are filled with joy right from birth whereas others struggle to adapt.  Guilt can already set in from this stage and can stay right until the grandmother stage.  Make sure you don’t get comfortable with guilt, deal with it whenever it rears its ugly head so that you can enjoy your many wonderful years as a mother. 
    Lack of sleep can also be a huge challenge during this stage so it’s really important not to take on too much during the first year of being a mother.  These years come with many joys and challenges but the most important thing is that you give your little one love.  Love is what feeds that precious little one more than anything else and creates a secure foundation which you will build on in the years ahead.  Love in the form of gentle words and physical touch is very important in the formative years.  Discipline also starts at this stage so that you don’t struggle later on in the school years.  Early discipline can simply be a firm no and a look of disapproval, followed by a kind hug afterwards just to show that you still love them.     
   
School Years
Once a child starts attending school he or she will go through significant changes, especially as they face many influences and challenges.  A little girl will find security in knowing that she is beautiful and a little boy will find his security in knowing that he is strong.  As you observe your children you will see how important these basic needs are.
     Your role during these years is to provide security for them by being available to answer their questions and to love them through their struggles.  Most of your time will be spent talking to them as they grow and learn.  Talk to them as often as possible about as much as possible so that you can build a good, strong connection with them which will be valuable during the teen stage. 
     The best thing you can do as a mother is to observe your children so that you can learn who God made them to be.  Once you discover who they are you can easily guide them through life.  There is nothing more harmful than trying to force your child to be someone that they are not.  So take your time to learn about them and offer loving guidance along the way.    

Teens
A teenager faces many significant changes both physical and emotional.  The most important thing you can do for a teenager is to take the time to understand their struggles and to guide them rather than dominate them.  Yes, boundaries are very important and you should not waver in this area as they will try to push the boundaries but will respect you more for putting your foot down. 
    The teenage years can be very confusing, especially for girls who have to learn to cope with hormonal mood swings.  As the mother of a teenager you will need to continue to be loving and patient but at the same time extremely firm and direct about what is acceptable and what is not.  Being their best friend is great but not at the expense of losing your authority as a mother.  You are a mother first who enjoys a close friendship with her teenager.  Keep that clear and you should do well. 
    Early teens (from about thirteen to sixteen) still need firm boundaries in place even though they think they are grown up.  Late teens (seventeen to nineteen) need to be shown trust as young adults but still need reasonable boundaries.  Early teens who rebel need to be disciplined and have consequences for their rebellion.  Late teens who rebel need to be set free after being told that the consequences of their rebellion are on their own head – do not bail them out of the consequences that they might suffer no matter how much you want to.  Finding the balance with your teens in the most difficult thing to do but don’t give up on the boundaries you have set.   

Empty Nest
Having your children leave home can either be very rewarding or very painful.  There are many factors that will determine whether you have rewards or pain but the biggest key is preparation.  Don’t be ignorant in this area.  Have a plan in place from their late teens so that when the time comes, possibly sometime in their twenties, you will be well prepared.  Here are some ideas that you could put in place towards the end of their teens or the beginning of their twenties – each child is different so you will be able to determine how long they will stay home although don’t leave it too late or you might end up surprised.  Don’t wait until your children have left home; begin preparations before that day comes.

Preparation Steps:
  1. Loosen the Bonds:  Relax or remove curfews and allow them more freedom and responsibility.  Trust their decisions and when they make poor choices only offer them advice if necessary.  
  2. Rediscover Yourself: Many parents forget the things that they once loved before having children.  Use this stage to rekindle old passions, sports and hobbies.  Have some ‘me’ time every week and don’t give it up if one of your children need you during your ‘me’ time.   
  3. Invest in Marriage: Enjoy a regular date night, go on short breaks, take time to communicate and have fun together.  Your marriage needs to last a lifetime and too many marriages fall apart at empty next stage.

     Allow yourself time to grieve.  No matter how well you prepare and plan to cope, there will be a time of grieving.  For me it was when my first child was approaching her eighteenth birthday and started dating.  I’m not sure if it was the birthday or the dating, but something kick-started a six month grieving period where I had to let go of her and start relating to her as an adult.  It was very painful but very necessary.
    Some parents grieve early as I did and others much later only after the last child has left home.  There is no telling when you have to go through this but you will have to go through it so you may as well be prepared. Read a book on grieving perhaps but make sure you understand what lies ahead.  Most importantly, find the good in this stage, each stage has positives and it’s a good idea to look for them so you can enjoy your life.

Grandmother
    Titus 2:3-5 has some wonderful advice for older women, “the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behaviour, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things— that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.”
A grandmother should be an example to all and should teach her children and grandchildren how to do life well.  It’s a wonderful privilege to have reached this final stage of being a mother and this stage should be embraced. 
    Take time to invest in your grandchildren, teach them from your years of life experience and build a good strong relationship with them so that they have someone other than their parents to talk to when they have problems.  Most importantly, enjoy being a grandmother. 

Find out more about Being a Mother here or use this material to host your own Girl's Night or Mum's Group.
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27.9.12

Conference Feedack II

We are still processing the conference video's and producing a stunning DVD of the three powerful testmonies.  Keep an eye out on our YouTube page for more conference highlights next week and don't forget to buy your King's Daughters T-shirt. 

In the meantime please have a listen to my message, You are More with Jesus, on video below or mp3 here.  I hope it greatly encourages you.  Also, watch the King's Daughters Conference website unfold with the exciting 2013 plans.  If you have a testimony of how King's Daughters has impacted your life please let us know, we would love to write about or video your story to share at next year's event.


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24.9.12

October Women in Business

King's Daughters Women in Business is launching our very first Women in Business Network event this month. This event is designed to inspire you in the area of business, to equip you for success and to offer you an opportunity to tell others about what you do. It doesn't matter what area of business you are in, Women in Business will offer inspiring professional tools and connection opportunities to build a healthy and prosperous professional life.


For full benefits of Women in Business join the network today.

Meeting Info:
First Wednesday of every month, 12-2 at The Little Owl, GL53 8EB
Pre-booking essential - Member £20, Non-Member £30
Including tea, coffee, pastries, crudités & fruit.
For more info get in touch or join the group

October Subject:  Creating an ABCD Database – the instant growth strategy that works! by Angela De Souza

October Offer:  Introduce a friend and get £10 refund on your ticket.  Introduce two friends and your ticket will be fully refunded.
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22.9.12

Conference Feedback


We had a beautiful day together on 8th September, thank you so much to you all for your incredible support and prayers. Feedback and testimonies have already started flooding in, have a read of some of them here. Also, keep an eye on our YouTube page as we update it with the speakers messages and conference highlight videos.


We had the stunning Instruments of Praise gospel choir lead us in worship and it was truly heavenly. We also had Daughters of Davis who absolutely blew us away with their fantastic acoustic folk/soul vibe.


Our Women in Business section was a real treat with stalls offering all sorts of beautifully displayed goods. Jill Chitty from the Entrepreneurs Circle spoke to the women in business offering practical tips for business growth. Other breakout sessions included a Hope for Justice talk by Naomi and Cynthia shared her testimony of life as a Samburu woman.

Molly Catherine Beebee from Cirencester Creative Dance Academy dazzled us with her spectacular ballet and the beautiful Tricia Bailey gave us all goosebumps when she sung her brand new single - Your Love and Grace. Tricia didn't just sing us a song, she imparted something very powerful and she did it through the most intensely beautiful, heartfelt vocals. We will definitely be featuring Tricia here on the King's Daughters blog again as soon as her single hits iTunes. You don't want to miss out on this one ladies!

A very big thank you to the D7 Men for serving us and the children all day long and to Lorah Kelly for the stunning photos.

It's not too soon to book your place for the 2013 King's Daughters INTERNATIONAL Conference. We have a bigger and better conference planned with a fantastic international menu including African curries and traditional Brazilian dishes. D7 Band are working hard on a brand new acoustic album which you will get to enjoy at the conference and CCDA are already working on a dance spectacular that will start our day with a bang! Loads more news to come, don't miss out - book your place now. www.kingsdaughtersconference.co.uk
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17.9.12

Being a Friend - Who Offers Godly Advice

It’s not easy knowing when to speak into another person’s life and when to hold your tongue.  Some people speak into other’s lives all the time but their words bear no fruit and other people seldom say anything and miss opportunities to sow valuable seeds into another person’s life.  A great friend is one who knows the value of giving Godly advice and will do so whenever necessary.  There is also a great deal of value in knowing when to say nothing and just offer loving acceptance. 

So how can we become a friend that offers Godly advice?  There are two simple steps 1) get to know God and 2) get to know your friend.  It is that simple. Let me give you an example of a man who received unwise advice from his friends, advice which ultimately led to his death.  His name was Haman and he was a 5th Century B.C. noble and high-ranking political advisor of the Persian Empire under King Ahasuerus.  He found himself in a difficult situation, nevertheless Haman restrained himself and went home, and he sent and called for his friends and his wife Zeresh . To cut a long story short, they did not give Haman Godly advice and he was hanged as a result of following it. This story is one of the most famous stories of Jewish history and it could have turned out very differently if Haman had friends who offered Godly advice.   
    Your advice might not be so dramatic but how do you know that what you say to your friends might not lead them down the wrong path that could end in disaster?  Proverbs 15:22 says that, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”  It is good to have a group of people that you trust to give you advice.  People who you know have your best interests at heart.  People that care about you.  Also, do your best to be that person to your friends. 
     To give Godly advice means that you know God.  The best way to know God is to read about Him in the Bible.  If what you are advising your friends to do is in line with what the Bible says then you can rest assured that you are giving Godly advice.  The Bible is full of gems that can help you to help your friends. 
    Another way to offer Godly advice is to pray to God and ask Him to give you wisdom.  It says in James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.”  A friend who gives Godly advice takes time to pray before speaking because she understands that her advice could dramatically affect her friend’s life. 
      Being silent might be the best Godly advice you can give a friend at times.  Too often we feel we have to have an answer for everything but sometimes just having a listening ear is all our friend might need.  Our unnecessary words could bring confusion or burden our friend and so at times the best advice is no advice at all.  Proverbs 17:27-28 puts it quite nicely, “He who has knowledge spares his words,
And a man of understanding is of a calm spirit.  Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace; When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.”
Being and having a friend who offers Godly advice is valuable, especially in this day and age when anything goes and so much contradictory advice is given from all angles.  Make sure you have Godly friends and aim to be a friend who gives Godly advice. 
      Finally, giving Godly advice also has to do with knowing your friend.  Take time to listen before you speak, after all God did give you two ears and only one mouth.  Make sure you have all the info you need before advising your friend and take time to understand not only the situation but how she feels about it.  Too often us girls jump in with all sorts of advice before we fully understand how our friend feels or what the real problem is.  In most situations we need to take our time to get to know our friend, to truly understand them before offering advice. 

Find out more about Being a Friend here or about using our material to host your own Girl's Night here.
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